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A horizontal desk mat with a textured background of muted yellow and gray tones. The top text reads “THIS DESK MAT SCREAMS ‘HR-SAFE’.” Below it, smaller text says, “MY BROWSER HISTORY ...not so much.” All text is in black and capitalized except the final line, which is lowercase and cursive.
The desk mat is displayed in front of a standing full-size computer screen for use with a separate keyboard.
The desk mat is displayed with a laptop nearby and a mouse on it, with assorted office items lying on the desk as well.
A horizontal desk mat with a textured background of muted yellow and gray tones. The top text reads “THIS DESK MAT SCREAMS ‘HR-SAFE’.” Below it, smaller text says, “MY BROWSER HISTORY ...not so much.” All text is in black and capitalized except the final line, which is lowercase and cursive. This is the medium size.
A horizontal desk mat with a textured background of muted yellow and gray tones. The top text reads “THIS DESK MAT SCREAMS ‘HR-SAFE’.” Below it, smaller text says, “MY BROWSER HISTORY ...not so much.” All text is in black and capitalized except the final line, which is lowercase and cursive. This is the large size.
This is the corner of the back of the desk mat, showing the 100% neoprene construction.
A horizontal desk mat with a textured background of muted yellow and gray tones. The top text reads “THIS DESK MAT SCREAMS ‘HR-SAFE’.” Below it, smaller text says, “MY BROWSER HISTORY ...not so much.” All text is in black and capitalized except the final line, which is lowercase and cursive.
The desk mat is displayed in front of a standing full-size computer screen for use with a separate keyboard.
The desk mat is displayed with a laptop nearby and a mouse on it, with assorted office items lying on the desk as well.
A horizontal desk mat with a textured background of muted yellow and gray tones. The top text reads “THIS DESK MAT SCREAMS ‘HR-SAFE’.” Below it, smaller text says, “MY BROWSER HISTORY ...not so much.” All text is in black and capitalized except the final line, which is lowercase and cursive. This is the medium size.
A horizontal desk mat with a textured background of muted yellow and gray tones. The top text reads “THIS DESK MAT SCREAMS ‘HR-SAFE’.” Below it, smaller text says, “MY BROWSER HISTORY ...not so much.” All text is in black and capitalized except the final line, which is lowercase and cursive. This is the large size.
This is the corner of the back of the desk mat, showing the 100% neoprene construction.

Clean Desk. Naughty Thoughts. Active Imagination. – Desk Mat (Free U.S. Shipping)

This is the perfect desk mat for those who have to keep up appearances for the HR department. On the surface, it says, “I’m professional, organized, HR-compliant.” But you know the real truth. You’re one browser tab away from an enemies-to-lovers steamfest.

The “HR-Safe” desk mat is a wink to your double life: corporate by day, chaos-loving smut reader by night.

It handles serious tasks and scandalous daydreams equally well. Add it to your cart and let your desk pretend to be the adult in the room.

Product features

  • Non-slip bottom
  • Durable hemmed edges
  • Made from 100% Neoprene
  • Available in three sizes
  • Warm water and dish soap to clean spots off
  • Soft-bristled brush for hard-to-clean spots
FYI: Colors may look a smidge different IRL. Blame your screen, not us—we’re fabulous in all resolutions.
Made-to-order means you don’t get your steamy goods overnight. Please allow 1-2 business days for production + 5–7 for delivery.
$34.99
$34.99
Sold Out

Size: 12" × 22"

Sku: 29415062731961472525

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