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Priorities, Babe. Smut First – Snarky Desk Mat (Free U.S. Shipping)

This desk mat gets it. “Work First, Smut Later” isn’t just a mantra—it’s a lifestyle. It keeps your outer productivity queen in charge while your inner smut goblin lurks just beneath the surface until 5:01. It’s how you balance chaos with class.

Ready for spreadsheets, steamy scenes, and everything in between, this mat stays put no matter how dramatic the plot twist—or the inbox. It's the subtle desk accessory that screams, “I do my job… but I’m emotionally invested in mt TBR list.”

So whether you’re grinding through a deadline or re-reading a spicy scene for the third time, this mat’s got your back (and your mouse). Add one to your cart and declare your dual lifestyle with pride.

Product features

  • Non-slip bottom
  • Durable hemmed edges
  • Made from 100% Neoprene
  • Available in three sizes
  • Warm water and dish soap to clean spots off
  • Soft-bristled brush for hard-to-clean spots
FYI: Colors may look a smidge different IRL. Blame your screen, not us—we’re fabulous in all resolutions.
Made-to-order means you don’t get your steamy goods overnight. Please allow 1-2 business days for production + 5–7 for delivery.
Regular Price
$39.99
Sale Price
$39.99
Regular Price
Sold Out
Unit Price
per 

Size: 16" × 32"

Sku: 32048530082159736426